Post by friendofsophia on May 6, 2014 6:40:12 GMT -5
So I wake up in the middle of the night (not that strange since half of the week I work midnights) my head racing with thoughts, so I get up, take a shower and suddenly, some things click. I realize how hindered my inspirations are by my fear of others opinions of me. Even while writing this I'm thinking: I've realized this long ago why do I think this is novel?, everybody knows this!, who cares anyway?, so this is your big "inspiration" you got up in the early morning to write about?, and so on and so on. But thats just it, thats how the archons keep us enslaved. We all have different things that prevent us from carrying our wisdom through to words and action. Since we realize that any words or images we can come up with in this world of forms is insufficient to truly describe our priceless moments of Gnosis, our inner archons are at work convincing us that since our descriptions are imperfect, they are worthless. For others like our more orthodox brothers and sisters, their archons are working to convince them that their words and images are perfect and do not just point at the truth but are the truth. They work on everyone in different ways, all trying to keep us from realizing that which, perhaps, they don't realize themselves.
I've been wanting to post more on this site and have been meaning to join you all on the live service again yet a busy schedule and ,probably more influentially, my over-thinking has hindered it. It was exciting to find a group of people whose conception of Gnostic Christianity was close to mine. Yet I almost immediately found myself overly concerned with what you all thought of my ideas. Perhaps my ideas and beliefs were not academic enough or my unorthodox take on concepts was different from others unorthodox concepts. Pretty insane since my affinity for non-conformity played a big part in leading me to Gnostic Christianity to begin with, yet once again I worry I'm not conforming to non-conformity. Same old song and dance I went through growing up with styles and music scenes and all that. Even now, looking at what I just wrote, I'm thinking "what the hell has this to do with Gnosis?" But it has everything to do with it because it's the truth.
Like I said, the archons work on us all in different ways, but so does Christ and Sophia. There are many levels and ways of understanding the figures of Christ and Sophia but lately I've been finding the most helpful to me has been thinking of them in terms of the prayer I learned years ago in recovery from addiction: "God grant me the knowledge of your will for me and the power to carry it out." To me that kind of knowledge is Gnosis, the Holy Spirit, Sophia ( I know these terms are not interchangeable for all Gnostic Christians, but for me, more and more, I feel they are). And to me the power to carry it out is Christ: unconditional love, faith, reason, and anything else you might need to overcome the archonic fake fluorescent light and the demonic guilt-soaked darkness. I've come to realize that my drug addiction was fueled by the glimpses of Gnosis that drugs offered. Though drugs can, at times, allow one to glimpse through our "mind-forg'd manacles" to what Holy Sophia has been trying to show us all along: who we are, why we are here, and what we can do, they also tend to sap our ability to remember much less make sense of or carry out what we have been shown. In the case of addicts, I think we fall in love with the messenger, the counter-fit spirit, instead of the message or the true messenger leaving our bumbling egos, our little internal Yaldaboaths filling in the gaps and trying to run the show. Even after getting sober, people like me long for Sophia's sweet Gnosis, yet when she gives us what we need and can understand for now, we still want more (as if it were a drug) and we ignore Christ knocking at our door wanting to help us put the Gnosis we have to work................................so hopefully I answered that door this morning and this will make sense to someone!
I've been wanting to post more on this site and have been meaning to join you all on the live service again yet a busy schedule and ,probably more influentially, my over-thinking has hindered it. It was exciting to find a group of people whose conception of Gnostic Christianity was close to mine. Yet I almost immediately found myself overly concerned with what you all thought of my ideas. Perhaps my ideas and beliefs were not academic enough or my unorthodox take on concepts was different from others unorthodox concepts. Pretty insane since my affinity for non-conformity played a big part in leading me to Gnostic Christianity to begin with, yet once again I worry I'm not conforming to non-conformity. Same old song and dance I went through growing up with styles and music scenes and all that. Even now, looking at what I just wrote, I'm thinking "what the hell has this to do with Gnosis?" But it has everything to do with it because it's the truth.
Like I said, the archons work on us all in different ways, but so does Christ and Sophia. There are many levels and ways of understanding the figures of Christ and Sophia but lately I've been finding the most helpful to me has been thinking of them in terms of the prayer I learned years ago in recovery from addiction: "God grant me the knowledge of your will for me and the power to carry it out." To me that kind of knowledge is Gnosis, the Holy Spirit, Sophia ( I know these terms are not interchangeable for all Gnostic Christians, but for me, more and more, I feel they are). And to me the power to carry it out is Christ: unconditional love, faith, reason, and anything else you might need to overcome the archonic fake fluorescent light and the demonic guilt-soaked darkness. I've come to realize that my drug addiction was fueled by the glimpses of Gnosis that drugs offered. Though drugs can, at times, allow one to glimpse through our "mind-forg'd manacles" to what Holy Sophia has been trying to show us all along: who we are, why we are here, and what we can do, they also tend to sap our ability to remember much less make sense of or carry out what we have been shown. In the case of addicts, I think we fall in love with the messenger, the counter-fit spirit, instead of the message or the true messenger leaving our bumbling egos, our little internal Yaldaboaths filling in the gaps and trying to run the show. Even after getting sober, people like me long for Sophia's sweet Gnosis, yet when she gives us what we need and can understand for now, we still want more (as if it were a drug) and we ignore Christ knocking at our door wanting to help us put the Gnosis we have to work................................so hopefully I answered that door this morning and this will make sense to someone!
